31 Jan How deep are we immersed in our Home life?

Let us imagine that we can outsource all chores such as cooking, cleaning, childcare and shopping. Someone out there is willing to do all of these for us. How much will we delegate? The question is tricky (and revealing). Of course, we can have financial and/or family obstacles and simply cannot afford help, so we just trod along and do our best. If, on the other hand, we can afford such help and there are people willing to do the job, how much will we outsource? This depends largely on our priorities and it is one of the most important questions to ask.

Why? Well, the truth is that if we outsource too much and too often (permanently?), we grow detached from reality and we float in outer space of our job or creative pursuits, while the undercurrent of home life runs its course without us. It is dangerous on several levels, and I will let the reader figure out why. The kids are raised by someone else, the husband doesn’t even know the taste of our cooking, we make a mess, but we do not deal with the consequences (the cleaning lady is due to arrive at noon). Or, let’s take the other extreme, also dangerous: when we do not let anyone help us at all. We grow (sometimes angrily) independent, chronically tired, and sometimes such permanent fatigue breeds resentment. This is when, paradoxically, it is hard for us to get away from the daily grind, as we fear any outing or modification of  our everyday routine. Our forehead is adorned with a crown of self-imposed martyrdom (rather prematurely). In order to navigate between these two, I suggest a few questions:

• Imagine that you can afford any help. Which things will you delegate? To what extent, making sure life is easier but home is still yours to run?
• How much can you make the workload fighter with equipment such as a dishwasher, a clothes dryer, a microwave? Or by placing the equipment in a strategic, convenient place (a new recycling box at hand, a vacuum closet right by the living room etc)?
• Do you have anyone who, although not a family member, is ready to help in emergency situations? Of course, by the same token, you should be able to offer them help in case of an emergency. Knowing this is extremely helpful.